just unlucky.

these past few days have been the most unluckiest ones i've ever had in my life.
it started with the marathon which stained my clothes with its scent.
next, i watched portsmouth lose while my money is killing me softly.
feeling damn low to the down, i went to sleep.
only to be woken up by my mom the next day screwing me while i'm half-asleep due to the scent on my clothes.
feeling damn shit, i decided to take a breather and hit the gym.
i only realised the number of people that celebrates deepavali when i entered the gym.
the gym was full to the brim. everyone was literally sharing the machines like two or three per machine.
i was damn pissed as i ended up doing nothing. wasted $1.50. luckily i met my cousin inside.
which leads to his idea of running at the stadium. went there and feeling eager to release my frustration.
i ran like a mad dog forgetting that i just had a marathon the day before.
i nearly puked and fainted, surviving only on the thought that i shall not be as weak as swank.
was intending to visit my grandma for a while after gym but had to drag myself home due to my condition.
reached home, bathed then went dead.

tmr's gonna be the day which decides whether i promote or i should take the s paper. i hope i promote as taking a s paper for gp to me is damn lame.

remnants of whats left in me.

i have never been this scared about taking back my results. i realised that tomorrow determines my life, the path that i will take. i hope i promote, for that will be my emancipation.
if it turns out otherwise, i told myself i will not cry, for i know i did my best. deep down i know i can do better, i'm not that weak.
with every failure, i told myself i will learn from it and grow. for what not kills me makes me stronger.
the wait seemed eternity, an everlasting urge to just end the sorrow. but when the day really comes, i trample in fear for its just typical human genetics.
i hope the wait is worthwhile, for if not i'll just float with the wind that is waiting to embrace me.

for this is my altar ego.the side that defines me for who i am.